Lena was sitting with her mother on the terrace of her house during a home town visit, which wasn’t very frequent on her part. The summer was approaching and she had only a week of classes before her. Her half-siblings were playing in the garden, all blond and naughty, her step-father was away on a business trip.
Her mother was looking at the children. Lena started in as a matter-of-fact way.
‘You know why I moved away when I was sixteen? Do you know why I moved to Warsaw?’
The mother’s face didn’t reveal any emotions.
‘He touched me. Your husband touched me. When you were pregnant, he came to me, watched me. Once he walked into the bathroom when I was taking a shower...’
Lena realized that she was saying it for the first time in her life.
The mother exhaled the air.
‘He’s such a good father. He’s taking us all to Tunisia this summer. The best hotels, kids will have fun. I wouldn’t have such a great big family if it wasn’t for him. He wasn’t like your father, who came by, broke my heart, and left me with a child.’
Lena knew that whatever she said at that moment, wouldn’t make an impact. She gave up and felt comforted by the fact that she didn’t live with her mother and her step-father anymore. Her side of the story was insignificant. Some girls suffered more than her. Some didn’t have a chance to leave.
When she was leaving school, she noticed Karol with his wife. Somehow she felt the same as with her mother. Children still had no voice. Lovers had no voice. What would it change if she told his wife? She was pregnant and she seemed to feel happy. Maybe Lena was just a crisis in a long-lasting relationship? Maybe they were both vulnerable? Maybe it wasn't meant to be?
Lena knew that her feelings for him were slowly deteriorating. It was just a moment. This affair would have bigger consequences for him than for her. It would destroy his marriage. She had nothing to lose, she decided to stay quiet and move on. She didn’t tell anything to anyone just the same as over ten years ago when she moved to Warsaw. The majority of affairs happened behind the closed doors, the majority of wives suspected something, but calculating the pros and cons of divorce, didn’t say anything. The majority of abused children waited until adulthood to spill the beans. Lena was no better than that. She weighed pros and cons and didn’t want to complicate other people’s lives at her benefit. She lost the battle with personal justice.
But Lena was optimistic, she was invited to Sweden by Olaf de Palma to admire Swedish summer at his cost. He also paid her for solving the mystery (who knew where he got his money from?) and for the first time she appreciated the difference of earnings between Swedes and Poles. She had time to think about her career. She also sensed that he liked her and she really needed someone who liked her at that time.
When she was leaving school, the last day of her life as a teacher, she passed little Marianne, who was being told off by her mother, an attractive businesswoman in high-heeled shoes. She couldn’t help but overhear the conversation.
‘We do everything for you. I work 70 hours a week and fly business to buy you the best clothes and the best toys, and the best holidays. And your behavior at school is not even acceptable?! You should be grateful for everything you have. I didn’t have half as much as you have when I was your age, you ungrateful brat!’
Lena passed Marianne and smiled at her.
‘You have very good marks from English, Marianne.’ she said, ignoring her mother.
Marianne smiled back. And even though Lena was almost driven to a nervous breakdown by her behavior during classes, she sensed some mutual understanding. Marianne behaved as she behaved for some reason. There were always two sides of the truth.
A few days ago she was traveling by ferry between Świnoujście and Ystaad, enjoying the limitless spectacle of the open sea on the sundeck of a luxury and modern ship. Sipping drinks and buying duty-free candies and chocolates. Now she and Olaf were looking at the green flashes that crossed the sky in a magical way, reminding Lena of Star Wars. Everything was quiet and peaceful. Olaf was sitting by her side holding for her a bottle of beer. Their tents were set up behind them and Lena was enjoying her holidays. He was extremely grateful for discovering what happened to the missing children as this secret had been bugging him for a long time. A week ago, he expressed some feelings for her, which Lena took calmly. She didn’t want to hurt him, but she wasn’t about to jump into anything serious. She still had Karol in mind, but the last thing she wanted now was another complicated relationship. However, when they were sitting together watching Northern Lights up there in the Swedish North, it seemed to be blissfully easy.
End of Part 2
