Chapter 19 Leon

2:38 AM

Robert packed his things, with a set of tools he found in the kitchen cupboard he repaired the wobbly doorknob and replaced the glass in the window. Finally, he gave the keys back to Adam Fabjan and returned to him all documents and pictures which were connected to Alicia. He returned to Warsaw and went back into his fixed routine. He knew that he would be thinking about her for some time, he hated unsolved cases which dragged for long, but that was the character of his profession. Not all ended in success and sometimes he had to accept defeat.

One day, when he was emptying his bag, a few pictures fell on the floor, pictures from Paris, including one photo of Alicia from her high school times, when she, her brother and their mother were posing in front of a Christmas tree, all squeezed in a small sofa, apparently surprised by the photographer. Alicia was smiling, Leon was moody and was looking at the floor, their mother was waving to the photographer. Robert, again, looked at the picture and this time there was one detail which brought his attention. He even took a magnifying glass to be sure that he saw what he thought he saw.

He called Alicia’s mother and asked for Paulina’s phone number.

‘Does Leon have a flat?’

‘Yes, he has a small studio flat twenty minutes from the center, why do you ask?’

‘A studio flat? And do you know how much did he pay for it?’

‘When he bought it, it was quite inexpensive. About one hundred thousand zlotych.’

‘Ok, thanks. Can you give me his address? I’m going to pay him a visit.’

Paulina gave him the exact address and Robert ran to his car and placed himself a few meters away from the entrance to observe the flat. But for a couple of days, there was no trace of Leon coming back to his official place of habitation. Robert called Paulina again, this time to ask about Leon’s place of work.

At 5 p.m. Leon left the office and got into his car. Robert followed him for some time, but soon he realized that they were driving to the exact opposite district of Warsaw than the one he was supposed to live in. Leon had time to do the shopping and after some twenty minutes he headed towards the block of flats. It was a nice, new area. Modern blocks were surrounded by trees, bushes and nicely trimmed lawns. Leon disappeared behind the door, Robert followed his footsteps. Inside, he found the number of apartments with Leon’s full name and the floor on which he was living. It went pretty smooth. Robert pressed the ring and waited for an answer. Leon opened the door and looked at him with a mix of surprise and defeat.

‘How did you find out?’, he asked.

Robert showed him the picture.

Leon nodded and opened the door wider to let Robert inside.

‘Be quiet, she’s asleep.’

It was this one summer when they were left alone again because mother went to Germany for work. Usually, there was someone supervising them, an aunt or a grandmother, or even a neighbor. But this time there was no one. Alicia was eighteen, Leon was seventeen years old. One day, unattended, when they didn’t have much to do at home, they went through documents and birth certificates.

‘We don’t even have the same father,’ Alicia analyzed the papers, ‘She never tells us about them.’

‘Maybe there’s nothing to tell us about. They left. One was worse than the other. We don’t even look alike. Maybe we also had different mothers and she just took us from the hospital to have a family.’

They both laughed. They didn’t really like their mother. They felt that she was too simple for both of them. Most times they couldn’t talk to her about anything they thought was important. But they would never tell her anything along those lines. They knew that she allowed them to be the people they were growing to be and didn’t complain. She worked hard. They were grateful. They didn’t want to cause her any trouble.

That summer they started spending more and more time away from home. Alicia had a boyfriend. Leon physically changed. He started going to the swimming pool and football classes, he gained body mass. They both passed each other on their way to the bathroom, being unable to ignore their changed physique. They looked at each other with a sense of respect and admiration. Even as children, they didn’t fight with each other. They had an unwritten rule not to cause any trouble to their mother and they shared a mutual understanding and support rather than any hidden agenda. Leon always asked if he could borrow Alicia’s toys, he always came to watch her ballet performances. She helped him with classes and not even once shouted at him when he received a bad mark at school.

That night Alicia came back with tears, she fought with her boyfriend, he said some nasty things to her, criticized her dancing and friends she was hanging out with. He was jealous, but instead of fighting with his own demons, he really wanted to hurt her. She was sitting on the sofa and crying quietly like a girl suffering from her first broken heart, and to this sight came Leon. He walked straight from the shower, with a towel wrapped around his hips, his muscles wet from the water. He noticed that she was crying, he sat by her side and smiled in a funny way that always made her laugh. This time she didn’t smile back. She just looked at him. She noticed how different he was from her, how unfamiliar. He had different eye color, different height, different hair. As if he came from a completely different planet. And yet, he had never done anything to make her suffer. He never even told her that her primary school ballet was stupid. He even stuck plasters on her torn toes and massaged her legs when she came exhausted from the training.

She placed her hand on his cheek. He stopped smiling.

‘I...’

‘Hush...’, she said touching his towel.

Leon went red in the face. He felt she knew.

‘I love you,’ he whispered.

Alicia nodded and allowed him to do everything that he wished for. It was stupid. They didn’t even have protection. It was the first time for both of them. Short, awkward, and painful on her side. They didn’t think it through. What if she got pregnant? What would they do with the baby?

‘No one can know,’ she said clinging to his body, ‘They would destroy us. Mother cannot know. No one can know, Leon.’

He nodded in understanding and kissed her. That was the happiest day of his life. He dreamed about her since they were little kids. She was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Even though she was his sister.

They lived like this for the whole summer. They rarely left home. They just enjoyed each other’s company. When mother came back, they were left with secret handshakes, looks, occasional touches, and hasty love-making when mother was asleep in another room, with their fists in their mouths trying not to make a sound.

Last year of high school was difficult for Alicia. She broke her leg, stopped her modern jazz classes, started studying more and had less time for Leon. He didn’t care. He decided to be there for her. He took her from classes on his old motorcycle and made sure that she came back home safe.

When she was studying, they stopped. They decided that it had no future and they had to do with their lives what needed to be done. Alicia befriended Adam, Leon tried to forget. But when Alicia was tutoring and she got into trouble with one old, nasty student, it was Leon who took her home, not Adam. It was Leon who encouraged her to try her opportunities in Paris. Adam just came along and was surprisingly happy with the chance to develop his career.

Alicia was unhappy with Adam. They tried to make something of it, but there was no romance and no genuine feelings between them. She was hurt when he met the love of his life and then she started this irrational relationship with Marc. A married man. Worse still, Leon got married to Paulina.

‘She’s not even pretty. Are you sure that you are happy?’

‘She’s not as beautiful as you. She has other qualities. I cannot marry you.’

All this time Alicia sent money to Leon for the flat. She wanted him to have a place of his own. He lived in the flat that was provided by Paulina’s parents and felt like an unwelcome guest at the mercy of in-laws. Soon, he was able to buy a small studio flat, but Paulina didn’t want to move in.

‘I’ll send more money,’ Alicia promised, ‘I will earn more. You will be able to buy something bigger.’

‘I love you.’ Leon said with a broken voice, ‘I don’t want to spend my life with her.’

‘But you’re married. And we cannot be together. I will try to get on with my life, it will be fine in the end.’

Within a couple of years, Alicia got married to Victor. She couldn’t suspect that it would be a disaster. One time, he hit her so hard that she had to cover bruises with a thick layer of foundation. One time, he just couldn’t help himself and knocked her unconscious and raped her just because he was her husband. She couldn’t sit for a week. ‘Leon, do you still love me?’ Alicia cried over the phone.

‘I have loved you my whole life, sister.’

‘Then take me out of this hell,’ she begged and he knew that she was serious.

He flew to her the next day. Took her things, silently listened to what happened to her, nodded at her every relationship and silently clenched his fists when he learned about what was done to her by Victor.

At that time Paulina divorced Leon. It was a failed marriage from the very beginning. It wasn’t supposed to work.

With the money Alicia had saved, they decided to buy another flat, bigger and more modern. She left her job and returned to Warsaw, not informing anyone about her move.

It was just like over twenty years before. They were living alone, eating their favorite food, watching films, listening to French music. She even started dancing in her free time, which made him pleased. They aged, they were over forty now, and for the first time sure that this was what they wanted from life, despite it all, either criticism or judgment. They just didn’t have anything to lose.

‘Was it you who broke into the flat and left these dead animals with notes directed at me?’

Leon shrugged.

‘I didn’t have any better idea. I’m not the person who kills police officers. I just wanted you to leave the case. How did you know that she is with me?’

‘I didn’t know where she is. It was just this picture. Brothers and sisters don’t usually hold hands. And one more thing, she sent you over one hundred thousand Euro. For your little studio flat, you paid one-fourth of the amount. You had to do something with the rest, right? Can I see her?’

Leon led him to another room. Alicia was asleep on the sofa. She looked as beautiful as ever, but there was something different about her. She was plumper and a visibly rounder stomach made her blouse tighter.

‘She’s six months pregnant. We were planning to make her return from abroad with the child. And then we would just take care of it like normal parents. For now, she’s hiding here. I’m taking care of her.’

Robert nodded.

‘What are you going to do with us?’

‘Nothing. I’m not planning to give you away. I might just inform Adam Fabjan that she’s alive to make him stop worrying. And if I were you, I would send some letter from her to your mother. She’s worried sick.’

Robert left the flat, called Adam to tell him that Alicia is alive and well but her place of stay for some reason cannot be disclosed, and looked at the picture. He was glad that another case was solved and there were no casualties. He didn’t judge. He was far from it. People would all be judged in the end for their own choices and he wasn’t about to intervene.